Bitch mode: on. Ranting mode: on. Troll magnet: on. BEGIN! I was going to keep this short. Write two lines and leave it at that. I couldn’t.Maid for Me. Probably one of the worst puns (and books) in the history of man.And you thought Twilight was bad. Guess again.Ok, since I’m sure you’re dying to know what this book is all about, lemme quote some relevant stuff from the Goodreads description to paint a nice picture for you.Feisty Mina Lin waltzes on glass shards when she lands a job as billionaire Jaiden Daniels's maid. Korean drama much?Also, “feisty”. She’s as feisty as a dead rat.What happens when Jaiden hires her to become his pretend girlfriend?Prostitution!No, she doesn’t actually prostitute herself, silly. Duh.Pretending to be in love with the hot Rich Boy is hard, when Mina's heart only beats for her boy next door, Kiterin Forrests. Love triangle! I simply adooooore love triangles.I’m sarcastic. I hate love triangles with all my heart.AndKiterin Forrests.KITERIN FUCKING FORRESTS.... ... KITTEN FORESTS!!! What happens when Mina doesn't know what her heart wants and a crazy Stalker is after Jaiden's life, and the only person who can save him is Mina? Welcome to the world of Premenstrual syndrome!AndPrepare to be eaten by the giant marshmallow girl! Seriously. I’m not mean. The dude, Jaiden, actually says that she looks like a marshmallow. Jaiden could not believe a girl who looked like a marshmallow could take him down with such little effort. He struggled to break free. Now look at the cover. The girl on the cover looks actually pretty, anime or not. And she is not fat at all. On the contrary, she looks rather skinny. Now why would you make girls who have a body similar to this feel like they are flabby and marshmallow-like? Yes, I’m aware that I’m harsh but never underestimate the power of a low-self-esteemed teenage girl. They’ll starve themselves over any stupid shit.Conclusion time! Don’t. Just don’t. I only read this because it was for free. I’m full of regrets. Let me take the hit for you. Please.